212-word post, or “Jesus Goes to Burning Man”

And the Apostles gathered unto Jesus, who said unto them “Come ye into a desert place, and party awhile,” for there were many coming, with plans for great leisure.

And they departed into the desert by the cheapest possible RV rental, which did quickly overheat, stranding them. And the Penguins saw them thumbing a ride, and did stop to allow them such room as they had.

And Jesus, began to teach them many things, incessantly; for he had dropped too much ‘e’ and was a chatterbox.

In the evening, his disciples came unto him saying, “Um, where’s the food and water, Jesus?” and Jesus, having already abused his chocolate and wine privileges at The Lost Penguin, said “Get thee unto base camp for burgers.” The disciples found naught but coffee and ice there, and Jesus did harsh them for not having purchased something in Gerlach earlier.
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They didst find five kale chips, a feather boa, and a bag of glitter among them, and Jesus didst again harsh them for bringing in MOOP, upon which Peter told Jesus to drink a little water, maybe?

And the evening and the morning were the first day of Burning Man.  By day 3 Jesus had pissed off DMV, and was taken to Reno by air evac.

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